I'm baaaaaaack!!

Yeah, so I haven't blogged anywhere NEAR about like I said I was gonna. Pretty typical for me. Here's but a lil bit of what's been going on.

The main thing that's happened is that I was diagnosed with sleep apnea. I had a sleep study done, which was a really interesting thing to go through. Anyway, what happens is, you basically show up at the hospital around 9 PMish with your pillow, they sign you in, drag you to the sleep lab, and then the fun starts.

What happens is, you get yourself ready for bed, in your jammies or whatever, and then they wire you up with like, 30 different sensors. I gotta tell you, you haven't lived until you've sat in your jockey shorts and been wired up with more sensors than a '93 Buick. At least the lady doing the wiring up part was nice looking. I definitely got the better end of that deal. The room they put me in wasn't too horrible, I had cable TV and a decent bed. I tried convincing them I'd sleep a LOT better if I had a cute 'lil brunette to cuddle up with, but they weren't having any of that. Damn it.

I'm here to tell you, for what it cost to have that test done, one could have gone to Vegas for a weekend and had one hell of a good time.

So, they let me head off to sleep, which ain't easy to do when you're wired up. If you ever go through this, let me offer a wee bit of advice: If they offer you a sleeping pill, TAKE IT. Going to the bathroom was an experience too: it required me to be unhooked, and then off to my own lil potty, then getting hooked back up and back to sleep.

Later that night, they hooked me up to a CPAP machine, and tried that to see what'd happen. Wasn't too bad.

So, the test runs the rest of the night. Cool. About a week or so later, I head back to the sleepy doctor(my name for him)to find out WTF. I wasn't too surprised to find out that I had apnea, but what really shocked me was the fact that in a 6.5 or so hour period, I'd stopped breathing over 120 times. Yikes! says I. So, I get my very own BiPap machine, which helps me breathe, and therefore, actually get a decent night's sleep. Yay!

So, after the paperwork bullshit gets shuffled, I head to the medical place to pick up my machine, and an over the nose mask. I head back home, and come bedtime, I hook up this wonder machine, and off to dreamland I go.

WOW!!!

I woke up the next morning, completely rested for a change. Holy energy spike!!

So, after about a week or so, I gotta head back to the sleepy doctor after spending a couple nights hooked up to a portable oximeter to see how the oxygen levels are doing. Unfortunately, even with the BiPAP, turns out I still wasn't taking in enough oxygen.

So, I have an oxygenation machine, which hooks up through the BiPAP, and pumps in some supplementary O2.

I've named the machine George. George is a squat lil fellow, sitting about 2 1/2 feet tall or so. He's also a wee bit noisy, so he spends his time in my workroom, while a 25' hose sends the oxygen my way.

I greet George every morning when I shut him off. I think he likes that.

So, a few observations.

Life has become a lot better since George and the BiPAP got to town. I've stopped nodding off at work, which thrills the boss to no end.

I've also noticed that certain, um, 'romantic inclinations' have returned as well. They were always there, I guess, but when you're tired all the time, that doesn't seem as important as it usually does. So, that which was slightly dormant, has returned. The only thing is, how many ladies are willing to put up with the machinery, their noises, and waking up next to a guy wearing a full faced air mask? This is something I've tried to not think about so much. I'll worry about that when the time comes.

My outlook on life is different as well. I'm not nearly as cranky and irritable anymore. This thrills my coworkers to no end. And now that I have more energy, I can spend more time inventing new and exciting ways to annoy them, which brings me no end of amusement. I'm going to have to play some pranks on them.


In other news, it appears that I *might* have my jetski sold. This is a good thing, as the money earned will be put towards the purchase of a Nikon D40 camera! Woohoo!


I could go on, but I've noticed that it's 12:30 am, and I'm gonna head to bed.

I think next post, I'll talk about the tattoo I got, and that experience. Should be good reading.