I'm a rebel, baby...keep yer daughters away!

(BGM: Scream; Seven Nations)



Little background here.

My neighbor across the street was out on his roof about a week or so ago cleaning his gutters. He saw me walkin through the yard at Stately PartsGuy Manor, and jokingly asked if I owned a pressure washer.

Imagine his surprise when I replied 'Yep! Sure do!, I'll be right back!'

See, last Xmastime, PartsDad sent me a Black & Decker* pressure washer. It'd been sitting just waiting for a chance to be used, so this was as good a reason as any. GREAT machine, BTW.

My neighbor was most happy to finish a task that usually took a couple hours by hand, in just 15-20 minutes with the washer. After thanking me profusely, he asked if I'd ever been on a PWC. (jetski, in other words.) Upon getting my negative reply, he said 'Well, then we're going to have to get you out there!!!'


So, it came up yesterday that I had time to actually go. We caught up with his buddy, whose machine I actually used for my adventure. He hooked up the PWC to my neighbor's van, hooked up a pontoon boat to his wagon, and off we went, to sail upon the mighty waters of Gitchegumee. (Look it up.)

My neighbor was up first on the mighty red machine, and took off chasing the wind, and givin it one heck of a run for the money. I rode on the bow of the pontoon boat following him, and thoroughly enjoyed it. It'd been FAR too long since I'd been on the water.

Soon enough, my turn came to hop on the beast. After putting on a life vest and getting a few instructions, off I went. Did a few turns, experimented with what the thing would do. I'm sure I had the world's biggest grin on my face.

So, for giggles, I straightened it out, made sure there was no traffic in my way, and let 'er rip.

I'm here to tell you, running across a lake mere inches above the water at 60 mph, engine howling like a angered banshee is one of the most intense experiences I've ever had. 30 mph seems fast enough, but 60 is just incredible. What a rush!

That, my friends, is what I call Big Dirty Fun, which is about as much fun as one can have while still fully clothed. W00t!!

So, after a great deal of fun, we're headed back in to where we'd put in.

Pontoon boats, while a great deal of fun in their own right, just can't keep up with a jetski. I knew this, so after I'd zipped ahead of them a bit, I just sat around and played for a bit, running around in circles as fast as I dared. Whee.

As I was making a circle, I looked over my right shoulder to see a boat headed towards me, with a guy in uniform standing up making motions for me to stop. DNR.(Dept. of Natural Resources) This is never good. So, after I got stopped, they caught up to me a minute or so before my partners in crime. After a few cursory questions, he asked if I knew that I was supposed to be off the water an hour before sunset.

I said something about being on my way back to where we'd put in, which was mostly true. We just weren't gettin there very quickly, is all.

Amazingly, they decided to give us a break and just issue warning cites for me and the PWC's owner.

The DNR informed us we'd have to tow the PWC back to the dock, couldn't ride it, which made the return trip a bit longer.

We got to the dock the same time as a group in a nice older Baja ski boat. Said ski boat contained some attractive ladies who were impressed with being in the presence of scofflaws such as ourselves.

Unfortunately, I didn't have a camera along for this adventure, as the PartsBoss borrowed it for a trip. Sigh.

So, I got my first PWC ride, and a warning ticket from the DNR. I'm such a rebel.


Ladies, if you're suitably impressed with a rebel such as myself, feel free to send your picture to the usual address: roccoguy@yahoo.com


Us rebels need love too, ya know.